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Si mis taquitos tienen verduda... ¿Cuenta como ensalada?

Who think it's better: Instagram or Facebook?

Ojala perdiera peso con la misma facilidad con que pierdo la paciencia.

Whenever you feel stupid remember there are people outside catching Pokemon

Skinny people are easier to kidnap, stay safe and eat chocolate

At my age I need glasses.....wine glasses

If being sarcastic burned calories I'd be transparent by now

I'm in shape. Unfortunately that shape is a potato.

My doctor asked if anyone in my family suffered from insanity, I told him, no, we all enjoy it

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands

3 out of the 4 voices in my head want to sleep. The other wants to know if penguins have knees.

I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food

Dear mind, please stop thinking so much at night. I need sleep.

Does anyone else put things in a 'safe place' and instantly forget where the 'safe place' is?

If I was a bird, I know who I would poop on

Shhhhhh, I'm hiding from stupid people

Of course I talk to myself, I need expert advice

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