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You should never tell a psychopath they are a psychopath. It upsets them.

Stupid People Aren't Annoying They Are Free Entertainment

Never argue with stupid people. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

I'm not stupid. I just lack common sense.

I know that I am stupid but when I look around I feel a lot better

Tuesday isn't so bad...It's a sign that I've somehow survived Monday

I love it when the coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I'm going to be today

I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam

There is a certain happiness in being silly and ridiculous

I miss you like an idiot misses the point

Sometimes being silly with your friend is the best therapy

I'm 70% nicer after 4pm on Fridays

People say nothing is impossible but I do nothing every day

I want world peace and bigger boobs

Wishful Wednesday........wishing it was Friday

Being a Mom is my SuperPower

"Everything is taken more serious in quotes"

"Everything in quotes is taken more serious"

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Here's to the crazy ones

Lo he oído todo, lo he visto todo, lo he hecho todo... Solo que no recuerdo nada. 😕 (A.J. Simpson)

"This is hilarious. I've got an oscar" -Olivia Coleman

COMMON SENSE IS LIKE DEODORANT. THE PEOPLE WHO NEED IT MOST NEVER USE IT.

I DON’T NEED A HAIR STYLIST, MY PILLOW GIVES ME A NEW HAIRSTYLE EVERY MORNING.

Life is so short. If you can’t laugh at yourself then call me, I will

The only day I get through Wednesday is by avoiding people who call it hump day

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